Warning: Turtlecest; Genitalia is mentioned as well!!
Pairing: ...whatever you want? I think it's rather Mikey/Don, though.
"Well... that's... interesting?"
"What is, Donnie?"
"This random note someone sent me."
"...Leigh Walton? Who's that?"
"Friend from, uh... the IT Tech job."
"Riiiiiiiight. So, what is it?"
"What's what?"
"Dude, the message!"
"Oh, yeah. It just states some facts about the human structure, strength and such."
"Like?"
"Um... It takes 7 seconds for food to pass from mouth to stomach. A human hair can hold 3 kg. The length of the penis is three times the length of the thumb. The femur is as hard as concrete. A woman's heart beats faster than a man's. Women blink twice as much as men. We use 300 muscles just to keep our balance when we stand. The woman has read this entire text. The man is still looking at his thumb."
"..."
"It's really pointless information when you think of it, but kind of interesting too, I guess. What do you think, Mike?"
"..."
"Mikey?"
"..."
"Mikey, stop staring at your thumb."